I feel the Lord awakening this heart of stone. I sense the little flame that has been a light ember being stoked a fresh again. Isn't it amazing how the Lord can just speak to us in an instant? I'm starting to see some puzzle pieces fall into place in this season of my life. As I sat down for coffee with a new friend last night and we spoke about womens struggles and ministry joy just leapt in my bones. God has made me for this! How is it that we can get in the way of what God so longs to do through us? It blows my mind how my biggest obsticle can be the idolization of self and not so much in how great I think I am but more so getting caught up with how inadequate I feel so often. Either way we think of ourselves we are thinking of ourselves! Humility is not flogging ourselves again and again but it is the absence of self. Our thoughts are not of whether we look important or stupid, but what does God desire to do? Rely on God grace today. You are greatly lovely by your Father.
If you have never seen The New World then you are missing out my friends!! If you love nature, beauty and a picture of what true love and redemption look like then you MUST watch this movie multiple times :) It's on my top 5
Can I vent for a second?
Well I'm going to anyway.
Ok, looking at the circumstances of America right now you would think that it would be a sobering moment for many people. This should be a time that would cause us to reflect, scale back, change our constant craving for instant gratification, right?
The postman came in today and asked me how I was doing. I said I'm actually exhausted because I'm working teo jobs trying to pay off some debt. He said well one day when you win the lottery everything will be cool. I'm thinking in my head why are we always waiting for the big break or the responsiblity to fall upon somebody else? If we want to save money well then work another job, stop spending so much, don't buy a new flashy car!!!!! The irresposibilty of the generation before us is so evident in what we see today. That is myu vent for the day, thanks for listening
Well I'm going to anyway.
Ok, looking at the circumstances of America right now you would think that it would be a sobering moment for many people. This should be a time that would cause us to reflect, scale back, change our constant craving for instant gratification, right?
The postman came in today and asked me how I was doing. I said I'm actually exhausted because I'm working teo jobs trying to pay off some debt. He said well one day when you win the lottery everything will be cool. I'm thinking in my head why are we always waiting for the big break or the responsiblity to fall upon somebody else? If we want to save money well then work another job, stop spending so much, don't buy a new flashy car!!!!! The irresposibilty of the generation before us is so evident in what we see today. That is myu vent for the day, thanks for listening
Since I've been back from Papua New Guinea not one day goes by that I don't think about my experience with the tribal villagers in one way or another. I'm constantly humbled knowing how grand our God is and how small I am. It was such an incredible experience for me to see his love poured out to me in the depths of the jungle. On our side trip we had to take an 18 seater plane for 1 1/2 hours, a boat for 1 hour and a 4 hour hike into the jungle through streams etc. None of us knew what we were about to embark upon when we came into this village called Gegering. Looking at these people through Western eyes you would perceive these people to be poor beyond belief, dirty and tattered but there was something so content about them. I came into this village not really knowing what to expect and if I try to describe in human words how I was impressed upon it would pale in comparison to the real life experience. God is so marvelous at teaching us in His own way.
These people were glowing with the knowledge that they would spend eternity with their maker. They looked for every opportunity to listen to our stories, share their culture, feed us and make us feel welcome. We spent 5 incredible days with these people stuttering and trying to express to eachother the thoughts running through our minds. When words failed us we just smiled and giggled. On the last day ALL of the people in the village young and old lined up to shake our hands individually. We shook their hands for about 45 minutes in gratitude thinking that we would never see these people again until are days are done on this Earth. As I came upon one of the ladies that I'd been building a friendship with she shook my hand and slipped me a kina which is a small metal coin in the equivalant of a dollar in U.S. currancy. I was shocked and didn't really know what to do but I hugged her and gave her my bracelet to remember me by. We both stood there staring at eachother as she spoke to me in Pidgin saying that she was praying for my safety back home. I continued down the path of villagers and came upon another woman who gave me 2 kina. By this time I had reached the end of the line of villagers and started heading to the path into the jungle. As I arrived at the path I began to cry thinking of the EXCITED generosity of these people. Immediately it made me ponder if I looked for every opportunity to be a blessing. These people reminded me of the widow who put in her 2 mites to which Jesus replied this is the offering that pleases me. Out of their poverty they gave. Just to put this into context for you a kino is equal to about an hours worth of hard manual labor in their culture. Not only did these women give to me but to almost every single one of my classmates (14 in total). Calculating all of that up would be about two days of their wages.
Arriving back into the U.S I was pushed back into the rush of society. Everything in me longed to go back to the simplistic way of life that I had experienced for this month. Everybody around me said,"That trip just flew by " and I thought in my head not really. A day in PNG really feels like a day, meaning that you live in every moment. There's nothing really to occupy your time besides work and relationships. If you came to meet with a villager and you wanted to talk they would cease from their labor and talk with you for hours until you were done. Coming back into the states I felt as if everything around me was the same yet I had changed so drastically internally. I am still learning day by day how to apply the things that I've partaken of in the depths of the jungle. May I look ofr opportunity to be an excited giver. Whether that is scrapping my agenda, listening to somebody, sowing financially or just letting my life be a vessel for Him to pour out of.
Apparently Karolina K. Was voted by E! The sexiest women in the world.
As if we didn't need anymore blonde/blue eyed,fair skinned, waif ideas of "beauty" & "sexiness". I'm a blonde/ blue eyed girl and I'm sick and tired of seeing the lack of diversity in the media!!! Come on folks. There are so MANY different forms of beauty in this world.
I sat up talking to Allie last night and talking through many thoughts about Christian living, morals, life, relationships, this new year etc. A new year has begun for me, I am now 27. Tears came to my eyes as I talked with Allie about the reflection of Christ that I've seen in my local church in this last year. I never thought the simple actions of somebody stroking my back in prayer or the leaders of a church humbling themselves and literally washing another mans feet would be so deeply embedded in my mind. If there is one thing that I would like to grow in this year it would be to make myself available to serve the needs of others and for my heart to be awake/burning for what is on Gods heart. Lord, may I walk in humility and confidence. I've never been so awakened to the fact that humility breeds humility. What really is our agenda for "winning" souls to Christ? Even that terminology churns my stomach. Do I love the word of God so much that I can't help but express it? Am I so grateful for what Christ has done for me on the cross that I can't but help share the gratitude and grace that was shed upon me? Do I care for peoples hearts as much as I care for my own? Do I talk to people out of impulse or genuine delight in what God has made? I can't wait for the days to come!! Expectation wells up in my heart for what has already been prepared.
I was so challenged by a documentary on a missionary couple that I watched two night ago. This couple decided early on in their marriage that God was calling them to be missionaries in the Phillipines. They lived there for fourteen years and raised three beautiful children. They decided one year to go to a resort in the Phillipines for their anniversary. While they were away they were kidnapped by the radical terrorist group called Abu Sarem (associated with Bin Laden). This group kidnapped 24people in hopes that they could get ransom money to start their own Islamic state. Marcia the wife shared their story on camera from beginning to end. They were stuck in the highlands of the Phillipines for 11 months, starved and imprisoned. They saw people being beheaded, starvation, mass hatred and many other atrosities. The two most profound things that stood out to me were:
1. The husband (Martin) spoke with his wife while handcuffed to a tree. He said,"In this small village I've seen the most selfishness,greed and rage. All of those things I'm talking about are the things I see that dwell in me. I just began to cry as I thought about his perspective. He could of very easily chosen to grow hateful and bitter in his heart towards these people and rightfully so. It just didn't sit right with him because the teachings of Christ dwelt so richly in his heart. What profound love to see past the filth and darkness.
2. On the last day right before they were rescued Martin was shot in the chest and Marcia was shot in the leg in the midst of open fire between the Phillipino government and the terrorists. Only one of them left that jungle alive and it was Gracia. As she reflects on the whole experience she says," I went into the jungle very black and white. I was always so critical of everything and everyone." She began to tear up and said," Wouldn't it be such a tragedy if you spent 11 months of your life on this mountain side and didn't learn anything? I sure hope that I've learned something. Dear God I hope I'm a different person."
After the movie was over I just sat there in silence. I was so astounded by her faith and by her response to such a horrific experience. This did not draw her away from her Father, but actually made him more real and vibrant in her life. There are two roads you can take after something like that. You can walk out a life of bitterness, regret and sadness or a life of wisdom, honesty and deep rooted love. She chose the latter and the love that radiates out of her leaves me speechless.
1. The husband (Martin) spoke with his wife while handcuffed to a tree. He said,"In this small village I've seen the most selfishness,greed and rage. All of those things I'm talking about are the things I see that dwell in me. I just began to cry as I thought about his perspective. He could of very easily chosen to grow hateful and bitter in his heart towards these people and rightfully so. It just didn't sit right with him because the teachings of Christ dwelt so richly in his heart. What profound love to see past the filth and darkness.
2. On the last day right before they were rescued Martin was shot in the chest and Marcia was shot in the leg in the midst of open fire between the Phillipino government and the terrorists. Only one of them left that jungle alive and it was Gracia. As she reflects on the whole experience she says," I went into the jungle very black and white. I was always so critical of everything and everyone." She began to tear up and said," Wouldn't it be such a tragedy if you spent 11 months of your life on this mountain side and didn't learn anything? I sure hope that I've learned something. Dear God I hope I'm a different person."
After the movie was over I just sat there in silence. I was so astounded by her faith and by her response to such a horrific experience. This did not draw her away from her Father, but actually made him more real and vibrant in her life. There are two roads you can take after something like that. You can walk out a life of bitterness, regret and sadness or a life of wisdom, honesty and deep rooted love. She chose the latter and the love that radiates out of her leaves me speechless.
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